Phobias Are Good & Pangloss Meets Procrustes

Phobias Are Good 

Phobias are good

They keep you quite alert

Which helps you avoid hurt

Which can improve your mood.

And if you fear your food

It helps you to lose weight

Your symptoms will abate

Much more than they would

If you were not afraid.

So phobias can aid

In very many ways

For any who obeys

His plethora of fears

Must multiply his years.

Are you afraid of heights

Or of the pitch black nights

Or of your neighbor’s cat?

There’s nothing wrong with that.

Do you suspect your friends

Of planning your demise

Of telling many lies

To thus disguise their ends?

It may be that you see

With better clarity

The dark reality

Of what some friends can be.

Are you afraid to drive

Or to ride in a car?

This fear keeps you alive

And isn’t very far

From being common sense

For the happy recompense

Of acting out of fear

Is a smile from ear to ear.

Are you afraid to live?

This phobia is smart

For the trials that life can give

Can tear you clear apart.

Are you afraid to die?

This is a good fear too

And if you don’t know why

It’s the worms that wait for you.

But phobias do abate

And something like life ensues

But will this life be great?

It depends on how you choose.


Pangloss Meets Procrustes

“All is well,” the doctor said,

Stretched out upon the giant’s bed.

“How could life the better be?

Go on, my friend, dismember me.”

Procrustes, taken then aback,

Could not at once begin to hack

Upon Pangloss’s bound-up limb,

But simply stared a while at him.

Then shortly mused he, “What the heck,”

And smartly chopped the doctor’s neck,

Then laughingly said, “What the hell!

The Doc was right! Now all is well!”


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